I'm so Lit!
by That African Kid
Summary: Armin accidentally stumbles upon Ymir smoking some weed and after getting conviced to join her things get... interesting. Slight AruAni, EreMika One-Shot


**So I was kinda bored and I figured this would be fun to write. Hope you like it.**

' _Note to self. Never ask Mikasa and Eren for assistance in hand-to-hand combat AGAIN!'_ Armin thought to himself as he made his way back to the barracks from the Shiganshina trio's private sparring ground. During the course of their training, the trio had stumbled upon the clearing and it was Armin's idea to use it as a private sparring ground so that they could help him train. Eren and Mikasa were quick to agree to this plan and over the course of several months they have been training in secret.

Armin suddenly stopped in his tracks when an unfamiliar, earthy, scent invaded his nostrils. Armin's sharp mind quickly deduced that it was the smell of smoke but it was somewhat different. Since curiosity was Armin's leading thought, he walked, or rather wobbled, his way to where the smell was coming from. It wasn't long before he found the source of the scent and it was none other than squad 104's resident prankster Ymir. What drew Armin's gaze was a small, white, object nestled between her index and middle finger. As Armin drew nearer to Ymir, he finally realised that it was what people called a 'Joint'. He remembers seeing a few people back in Shiganshina smoking it and would jokingly offer him a pull. Armin was so drawn to the object that he failed to notice Ymir staring at him. Or maybe it was the fact that Armin thought she was sleeping considering just how lidded her eyes were.

"You wanna puff Blondie?" Ymir said calmly causing Armin to jump in shook. Taking a few breathes to calm himself, and unconsciously sucking in the weed-filled air, Armin gracefully shook his head in refusal. "Come on! Are you really going to be a little bitch?" That stabbed Armin's pride more than he would care to say. With new found determination, he sat down next to Ymir at the base of a large tree.

"Fine… but just this once! And DON'T tell Mikasa!" Armin said sternly as he took a hold of the joint from Ymir, who was nodding with a grin on her face. She was already on another planet. Bracing himself, Armin took a quick drag but immediately blew it out resulting in Ymir staring at him as though he declared that he was really a girl.

"What the fuck was that?"

"…"

"You have to allow the smoke to make love to your lungs." Ymir said seductively as she rubbed her chest for emphasis only for Armin to blush a bright red due to Ymir inadvertently rubbing her breasts in front of him. "Pull on the joint. Then suck in some air so that it goes to your lungs and deposits all its goodness. Then wait for about 10 seconds. Then blow it out." She instructed.

Armin knew what to do but was scared that he was going to choke on the fumes and develop a coughing fir in front of Ymir, who wouldn't let it down as long as she lived. Feeling as though he wasn't going to win here, he did as told. It took all of 10 minutes for Armin to be floating with the clouds, if his bloodshot eyes were anything to go by. The duo were already on their 3rd joint.

"Hey Ymir…"

"Hmm" she hummed softly, staring at the clouds whilst Armin was lying down on her lap, staring at her face.

"I once caught Mikasa masturbating." Armin said calmly but Ymir did a double take, looking at her Kush-buddy with wide eyes. "Yeah… it was crazy. We had that back-packing exercise to do in the woods remember." Ymir could only nod, knowing that her mouth was too dry to say anything. "Well remember that Mikasa didn't come with us because she fell ill? Well I had to go back half way through because I got stung by a bee." Ymir remembers the nasty mark on the boy's neck. "When I got back from the infirmary, I was tired so I went back to the boy's barracks and when I opened the door… lo and behold, there she was! On MY bed even!" Armin concluded as he took a second drag before passing the joint on to a shell-shocked Ymir.

"Did she fuck you up?"

"No. She was so busy yelling Eren's name, that she didn't notice me for a while. When she did however, she paused for about 5 seconds before she continued. I mean like What The Fuck!" Ymir couldn't hold her laugh in from Armin's rare moment of using colourful language. "Shit got really weird when she reached her orgasm because she cut cleaned herself up. Walked past me and into the girls barracks as if nothing happened." It was then that Ymir fell in fit of giggles, wondering if Mikasa orgasms with a straight face or not.

"So… how what did you do." Ymir asked after she controlled herself, somewhat.

"It was then that I discovered something."

"That you need to change your sheets?" Ymir retorted.

"No… That that Bitch is crazy." It was then that the duo started rolling on the floor, laughing their asses off. The laughter didn't even die down as the two made their way to the mess hall since it was 10 minutes into dinner time and the munchies had the two like a vice. Everyone was so into their own business that they didn't even notice when Ymir and Armin walked in, except for Mikasa. When Armin sat down next to Mikasa and across from Eren, who was arguing with Jean, he ravished his plate.

"Armin." Mikasa said to her long-time friend. Both she and Armin knew that a lecture was going to arise as to where he was and why are his eyes red.

"Yes baby?" This caught Mikasa off guard as she started mumbling then wrapped her scarf around her nose in a sign of defeat and to avoid people seeing her blush. Armin mentally gave himself a high-five before turning his head to the adjacent table where Annie was sitting not far from him. "Psst… Annie!" Armin said with a voice that was mixed with a whisper and a yell. Annie turned her stone cold azure glare at her fellow blonde only to see his signature smile plastered on his face.

"What do you want Arlert?" She said passively, her stoic face not breaking into any sort of emotion.

"I just want to say thank you…" This caught her by surprise.

"F-For what?" she uncharacteristically stuttered, causing everyone to stare at the two blondes but mostly at Armin since her managed to break through the wall of the 'Ice Queen'.

"For having such a soft ass." This _compliment_ made time stand still as everyone's mouth hang open but minds were blown when people saw Annie's blush. Armin continued to smile at her as though he hadn't dropped a bombshell. After 2 minutes for pure silence, Armin turned back to his food and continued chowing. Eren was the first one to reboot his mind.

"Armin! What's wrong with you!?" he all but yelled at his brother.

"I'm Lit."

 **End**

 **Just felt like writing this whilst I was working on the next chapter for Epitome of Greatness. Make sure to read it and drop a review.**

 **Peace.**


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